Love to be Hated

One of the most memorable quote from Machiavelli's The Prince is, "It is better to be feared than to be loved."  For so long I believed it to be true.  The pain and suffering I felt since I was young and the betrayals I experienced has lead me to develop a paranoid and ruthless personality.  One that never stops moving, one that is always on guard against any opponent, one that sees hostile action even though it might not be there.  Has it helped?  I can now honestly say no.  It may have helped in the past, against douchebags, against morons who believed that popularity was all that mattered, but now, we're in a more civilized age.  It's time to bid a farewell to arms, so to speak, and return life to normal.  I don't wish to be feared, I don't wish to seen as a boogeyman anymore, however, I question whether I can shake this habit off.  For me, to be hated is like an addiction.  I always thought I was hated because people were jealous of what I can do, what I am.  To be hated is to know that I am doing something right.  Perhaps it isn't, perhaps I'm hated because I am so always on guard, that I always bring out the negative and never see the positive.  It's over, it's time to bid farewell to arms and understand that it's always better to be loved than to be feared.

The reason I wrote this post is because I bumped into BOTH Sabina and Julia while I was at Geisel.  They're friends.  Small world, huh?  Sabina still think that I hate her so she hates me in return, and Julia... well I don't even have to explain.

Update:  Bumped into Julia again at the food court at Price Center.  Her friend is not Sabina, that's a relief I guess.

Note to self:  Realize that it's always better to be loved than to be feared.  Understand it, know it, live by it.