Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Remembrance

Did well on the quiz for MGT 5 today, and my packages are arriving.  Good I guess.  Saw Racquel today at Cafe Ventana.  I had a brief conversation with her, but it seems that I kind of rushed it.  Still haven't seen Julia at the market, I must have memorized her time wrong.

I have been thinking about the past today, thinking about all the people I inadvertently hurt.  I just want to apologize to them all.

I'm sorry Katherine, you fell in love with me and I was too much of a coward to say I love you back.  I broke your heart, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Serena Pang, you thought I was angry at you for losing my homework, I never was.  I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Susan Hooey, when we were graduating from high school you waved to me and I immediately turned away.  I didn't mean to upset you.  I should have apologized to you when I saw you at CCSF.  I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Lea Limbo, I didn't know what came over me.  You were a friend but I treated you like crap.  I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Bonnie Cheung.  When you waved I didn't wave back.  I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Jimmy.  I regret all the horrible things I said and done to you over the years.  I lead you down a horrible path.  I promise I'll make it all better.  I'm sorry.

I wish I had cured this social anxiety when I was still with Katherine.  I could be with her right now.  It's been two years but I still miss her.

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