A couple of things first. I bumped into Jocelyn during move out and we talked a bit. Didn't realize she was graduating too. My body language and facial expressions were good. When I kept going to play pool, people came in over and over again looking for a bathroom. I helped them out without being nervous at all. One of Cary's female friend from down the hall needed help moving their tv. I offered my help without hesitation and wasn't nervous conversing with one of them. I also sent goodbye emails to Dr. Poizner and Dean Bailey, thanking them for helping me along the way. No nervousness about sending those emails.
Through out this entire project, I've been checking every now and then to see who's been reading my blog. (I've noticed that someone typed in Ian Applegate Olson and ucsd intj bobby a few weeks ago on google. Ian? Bobby? If it is, I hope you guys enjoyed it.) Every so often I would find key words coming from google search such as "intj loneliness", "intj emotions", "intj relationships" from different parts of the world. It looks like I'm not the only one out there who is absolutely confused about what they are and what they should do to fit in.
In the last three years at UCSD, I've experienced failures, lost of potential relationships, and even heartbreak, but I feel that the experience gained has been invaluable. I feel that the experience I gained here would be helpful to all those confused INTJs and introverts out there looking for answers. It took a few days but I went back and compiled all the note to selfs I made over the years. It might not be 100% applicable to you, but there's enough overlap between all introverts for this to apply. This is the list:
- Be more opened minded, give new things a try.
- Be aware of your surroundings
- Smile more often to others, and be enthusiastic when greeting people
- Modify length of conversations to fit within context of situation
- Get your head out of the clouds, don't be so aloof
- Network more with the people around you
- Don't be afraid of women, treat them the same way you would treat a guy
- Soften your responses
- Think before saying something
- Know how to keep a conversation rolling and when and how to end it
- Communications is key to a good relationship, maintaining contact is key to strong relationships
- Be patient with others, and be more altruistic and caring
- Don't be so uptight, loosen up and have fun. Not everything's a competition.
- Facial expression and body language is important
- Learn to forgive and forget, don't be so vindictive
- Be comfortable with yourself and be able to make fun of yourself. Be confident
- Don't turn down invitations and clarify any misunderstandings
- Don't rush conversations, be more talkative, keep a conversation rolling and be positive
- Be friendly and relaxed around women, be more active in the pursuit of women, don't push them away
- Wave, smile and make sure people hear you when saying goodbye.
- Don't be whiny, don't be clingy
- Show affection to people you care for, spend more time with them.
- Don't ignore women who are attracted to you, don't give up so quickly
- Take more risk and chances, and jump on any opportunity. Improvise
- Face your problems head on
- Don't over think things, think short term, not always long term.
- Spend more time doing, not analyzing
- Trust your intuition
- Don't let old hatreds and grudges distract you
- Don't be complacent in who, what, or where you are.
- Don't be so interrogative, be natural
- Develop a better sense of humor
- Invest time and energy into a relationship
- Always apologize or say important things face to face in person
- Don't be passive aggressive
- Don't be so guarded and warm up to others quicker
- Be genuine in emotions and feelings, don't be arrogant, and don't be blunt and cold
- Be direct and straight forward with someone when you want someone to respond to you
- Be completely honest straightforward or not at all, don't flip flop.
- Don't objectify people
- Regulate emotions so that it would flow smoothly and consistently
- Be "normal", never reveal what you are unless you're extremely close to them.
- Stop making excuses, don't weasel out of things.
- Actively scan your surroundings when driving
That's it, that's the list of all I learned and experienced in the last two years, combined with research and experience from other, older INTJs before me. If you're reading this and you're looking for answers in trying to be "normal", I hope this helps you. If the list is too long, then just do this: ALWAYS FOLLOW YOUR INTUITION. That little nagging voice inside you is your greatest tool, guide, and weapon in this strange world we live in. I didn't listen to mine on several occasions and suffered for it, so listen to your's.
The reason I started this project is because I'm afraid I'll end up being alone for the rest of my life. There are so many INTJs and introverts whose time has passed and they slowly faded away without even a whimper. I don't want to be like that, I want to be a husband and father someday. I hope to start a family of my own someday and this project was the first step in doing so. To all those who came before me but passed on, this one's for you:
One last note, I got my final grades back. A in literature class, A+ in computer programming, and C+ in OChem 140c. Sigh, that's the end of my pharmacy career. If I had gotten a B- in ochem, I would've gotten Provost's Honors for my last quarter rather than a 3.43. Good to know I get one last kick to the balls before I go.
Note to self: Push forward, live a good life, start a family.
Home:
@5/14/13: Ch: 3332 Ff: 2189 Ie: 1910 Saf: 1067 Op: 318 MSa: 160
Search terms:
julia popova ucsd -> using chrome, windows
INTJ@UCSD yoon -> using firefox, windows
julie tu ucsd -> using safari, iphone
julia popova ucsd -> using android
@10/30/12: Ch: 2985 Ff: 1729 Ie: 1533 Saf: 914 Op: 218 MSa: 126
Multiple Search terms that appeared:
julie tu ucsd -> using safari, most likely with iphone
julia popova ucsd -> using safari, with mac
ucsd village market julia -> using windows, with internet explorer
stephanie fried hot ta and stephanie fried econ -> using windows, with internet explorer
@6/21/12 Ch: 2602 Ff: 1474 Ie: 1319 Saf: 718 Op: 197 MSa: 88
@7/13/14 Ch: 3833 Ff: 2435 Ie: 2310 Saf: 1331 Op: 464 MSa: 184
Home:
@5/14/13: Ch: 3332 Ff: 2189 Ie: 1910 Saf: 1067 Op: 318 MSa: 160
Search terms:
julia popova ucsd -> using chrome, windows
INTJ@UCSD yoon -> using firefox, windows
julie tu ucsd -> using safari, iphone
julia popova ucsd -> using android
@10/30/12: Ch: 2985 Ff: 1729 Ie: 1533 Saf: 914 Op: 218 MSa: 126
Multiple Search terms that appeared:
julie tu ucsd -> using safari, most likely with iphone
julia popova ucsd -> using safari, with mac
ucsd village market julia -> using windows, with internet explorer
stephanie fried hot ta and stephanie fried econ -> using windows, with internet explorer
@6/21/12 Ch: 2602 Ff: 1474 Ie: 1319 Saf: 718 Op: 197 MSa: 88
@7/13/14 Ch: 3833 Ff: 2435 Ie: 2310 Saf: 1331 Op: 464 MSa: 184
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ReplyDeleteHey, I'm a prospective UCSD transfer and I have a few questions about transferring to UCSD.
ReplyDeleteHow difficult is the econ program? I'm not very strong at calculus, but I understand the general ideas. I'm a little worried about being unable to adjust to the rigor at UCSD.
Also, I noticed from your posts that you minored in accounting. Was it difficult to do all that in two years? I noticed accounting minors had 7 courses.
For what it's worth, I found your posts interesting - I would really like to get out of my comfort zone like you.
Sorry if this seems really random.
Hi Enigma, it's no problem, I'm glad to answer some questions.
ReplyDeleteAside from the required calculus courses, econ classes don't really require a lot of calculus. Most of the calculus you'll do is in the econ 100 series and a couple of econ electives. You'll pretty much be using the lagrangian method over and over again which is pretty much partial derivatives and second partial derivatives. The difficulty is interpreting the word problems and knowing what to derive. For example, monopoly, oligopoly, perfect competition etc. each have their own equation so you'll have to know which function to derive to get the optimal quantity or price. If you do the problem sets the professors give out, you should get a sense of how the professors word their problems and what they expect you to use for that problem.
The macroeconomics econ 110 and econometrics econ 120 series don't have any calculus, but they have a lot of equations and concepts that you'll need to memorize. The econ 120 series is pretty tough and you'll need to learn STATA for econ 120B to write programs for the homework. (They'll teach you how to write the programs in class.)
Some of the econ electives require research and papers while others are just straight up exams, it depends on what professors you choose.
There is an off-campus tutoring place called TheEconTutor located in La Jolla Square Shopping Center. I never used it, but many UCSD econ students have said it's pretty useful, but you'll have to pay out of pocket for it.
As for the accounting minor, there are 7 classes and they are set up as a series so the next class requires the one before it. It can be done in two years, but I suggest you start immediately. You can take both Econ4/MGT4 Financial Accounting and MGT5 Managerial Accounting in the same quarter, but you'll have to take every other class one per quarter. Note that if you wish to take the CPA exam, you'll have to also take MGT 133 and MGT 134, which can be taken in the same quarter. (Rady's website can give you more detail.) Also note that in Jan 1, 2014, CPA licensing requires a person to have 225 quarter units of education. I think you'll have stay for a summer session or two in order to finish the accounting minor in two years.
Sorry for the long response, but I hope it's detailed enough to help you. If you have any other questions, please comment again, I'll check back in a couple of days and I'll do my best to answer them. I hope you have a great time at UCSD. Take care.
Thanks for the detailed response!
ReplyDeleteYou should continue this blog in a part 2
ReplyDeleteHi guyjoesteve, I'm thinking about it, but there's nothing much to write about when I'm back home. Very little interaction with people aside from my family, which would make any posting boring and uninformative.
DeleteI am a female INTJ, just gone through a terrible job fair. Everything was so bad, my relationship, my friend,.. I want to give up. I tried hard to overcome my social anxiety, my passive aggressiveness,... I am tired. I need help
ReplyDelete