It's Monday, the day after all the graduation hoopla that happened during the weekend. As I walked to price center, past the empty soccer field, I couldn't help but tear up a little. I feel like I should have been there with them, that I should have walked across that stage, but at the same time I felt relieved that I didn't, knowing the economic conditions out there. Watching everyone graduate those three days also reminded me of how I failed. How I failed to make friends, how I failed to become a well socialized member of society, how I failed to get a girlfriend even though Julia and Julie was interested in me. Two years, and I accomplished nothing, even my little program to become more outgoing is slowly slipping away bit by bit.
I spent the afternoon today watching Cast Away, the movie about Tom Hanks being stuck on an island after his plane crashes. I feel just like him; alone, full of regrets, fighting for survival, contemplating ending it all. He survives in the end and gets back with his wife though. I wonder if I can do the same.
On another note, my current roommate Andrew doesn't seem that happy to talk to me. Either I said something stupid and hurt his feelings or he just plain doesn't like me. Meh, wouldn't be the first. It doesn't matter, my interactions with him are a means to an end. The more I practice, the better I get at talking to people and the higher the chances I'll have at getting married, that is what matters in the end.
Note to self: Keep interacting with Andrew and other people.
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