It is as I feared, the universe has gotten tired of me constantly pushing away people and now there is no one left. It's really odd, since I bought the cross necklace and wore it, it seems as though people are even more afraid of me than before. Why is that? On the first day I put it on, I felt a force, a sort of energy leaving my body. What was it? It doesn't matter now. It's been two years and I have done absolutely nothing. College is the most important time for finding someone and I pushed them all away. I now accept my fate and await my end.
Update: I ate dinner with Mazza tonight, it was nice. We talked for a bit and our conversation was amazingly normal. My behavior was normal, our topics were normal, everything absolutely normal. Sigh, I'm gonna miss him once he graduates.
Update 2: Just had a conversation with Jacob. Total bloody mess. So much for normal.
Stay calm, you're not out of time yet.
ReplyDeleteTime is relative to the individual. When you've screwed up one chance after another and you're socially awkward, then time is pretty much limited. Thanks for the kind words anyway.
ReplyDeleteToo many assumptions about me. Still, you're welcome.
ReplyDelete