When I was screwed over last year by my roommates and their friends, I thought to myself that this was going to be a repeat of what happened in middle school. What if the reason I am so emotional, so angry and vindictive is because subconsciously, I did not want my experience in middle school to happen all over again.
When I was in middle school, I was teased, bullied and rejected by the "popular" kids. I was so desperate to be liked that I constantly forgave them and pretended like nothing ever happened to be accepted by them. Perhaps I'm now lashing out at all perceived enemies because I don't what that to happen again. Maybe she was right and I didn't allow myself to feel anger, and now it's all coming out.
On another note, it seems that people don't like it when I eye track them. Should stop that.
Addendum: I received a email message from my homeroom teacher back in high school. It's nothing much, she was warning that her email was hacked and she sent it out to everyone. The question is how the heck did she get my email address? I have no recollection what so ever of me giving it to her. Weird.
Note to self: Don't eye track them.
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