Blast from the past and interracial relationships

Another girl from the past, this time a blonde.  The blonde's name is Julia, she works at the Village corner market.  She was attracted to me last year, but through some miscommunication I thought she hated my guts.  Every time I bought something and she was the cashier, she would stare at me and immediately wipe her hand on the counter top.  I thought she found me disgusting or something.  One night she was just staring at me and I gave a mean look in return.  During the return flight for spring break or winter break, she and I were apparently on the same flight from San Francisco to San Diego.  I saw her, she saw me, and she crossed her arms all pissed off.  That was when I realized she was attracted to me.  Several weeks later, I was in line waiting to pay for a couple of items, and standing next to me hoping to get my attention.  Being my socially awkward self, I kept looking at the clock on the wall to lose her attention (Nice huh?  God, I'm such an idiot)  It just made her extremely upset.  If I see her away from her colleagues, I'll try to apologize to her, though it doesn't seem like she remembers me.

This brings me to the other topic I have in mind, interracial relationships.  In this day and age, it seems like interracial relationships are all the rage, hell, just look at the Obama and Tiger Woods.  People are celebrating and cheering for them because they represent a "post-racial world and society."  However, I am extremely wary of being in an interracial relationship.  Don't get me wrong, I have no issue with folks that want to be in one because that is their life and choice, but I'm not sure if I can be in one myself.  

Even though I was born and raised in the U.S., I don't feel like I'm an American, I feel like I'm a F.O.B (fresh of the boat) straight from mainland China.  Yeah, I work out, watch porn, possess Western manners and I'm independent thinking, but other than that I don't feel like I can connect with most Americans.  I don't care for football or sports, I don't care for cars, and I find rap and modern American pop culture to be fucking stupid.  (I actually prefer music from the 80s.)  I can tell better jokes in Chinese than I can in English, and I always felt more comfortable around Chinese people.  It kind of explains why some of my most recent friends are F.O.Bs from Hong Kong and Taiwan.  If I were to just go out with any non-Asian, hell, non-Chinese, I have one hell of a cultural barrier to break.

Maybe in time I will get over this hesitation of being with non-Asian women.  Even though I had many Chinese and Asian girls chasing after me, I can't form a connection with them.  So right now I'm more of a beggar than a chooser.  If someday, somewhere a non-Asian/Chinese girl and I are having a great time and forming a great connection then I'll go for it without hesitation.

Note to self:  Be more open minded, give interracial relationships a shot.